Baby on Board and More Music
When Wilco became our family band
Shannon and I were so excited when we found out that she was pregnant. My search of earning a better income was quickly shifted into high gear when I found out I was going to be a father. It became go-time for building a career and slow-down-time for my fascination of becoming a professional musician. Before we learned that we were expecting a child, I was running like a mad man, trying to write songs and get them recorded with Bird. Something inside of me said I had very little time left before I lost my chance at playing live music as a profession. After we learned, I realized that I have my whole life to be a musician, but only eighteen years to be a dad at home. Preparing for a baby while worried about financial stuff is stress neither of us needed, especially Shannon.
I needed to get a stronger income and started applying for marketing jobs in the corporate world again, and thanks to networks of friends I was able to land a part-time job at the hospital, working from home (which was unheard of during those days), while continuing to work at The Source Weekly.
Shortly after I got the second job our son, Benjamin, was born in May 2008 during a rainy Memorial Day weekend. It was a very happy time in our lives. New parenting responsibilities took over. There was very little time to do much of anything outside of work and parenting. Shannon and I quickly noticed that our social circle started to really shrink. I was able to continue to break away every once in a while, to record some tracks with Bird for KouseFly and make it out to a few of the open mics.
As the summer arrived, we got the amazing news that one of our favorite bands was coming to Bend. Shannon had been a long-time fan of Wilco beginning in the early 2000’s. I never really listened to them before she had introduced their sounds to our home. The first time I saw them live was right before we got married in 2005. Shannon and I enjoyed our first festival excursion together. We attended the Sasquatch Festival held at the Gorge Amphitheater in Washington next to the Colombia River. Over two dozen bands performed – the biggest draws were surely Wilco, Modest Mouse, and The Pixies.
She was very excited about Wilco, which was her favorite band. We sat up on the grassy slope, overlooking the amazing view of the stage in front of the Columbia River. There was something wrong. The band’s lead singer, Jeff Tweedy, seemed to be agitated about something.
“They are playing my favorite song!” Shannon shouted when Wilco started playing “Spiders (Kidsmoke)”, and she knew exactly when they were going to break out into a full jam. I was super impressed with her. We both learned later why the band was having such a rough time. Apparently, the monitor sounds were off, and the artists could not hear themselves. It must have been a difficult issue to face with thousands of music fans in the audience.
Now as parents of a newborn, it seemed like a gift to not have to travel to enjoy Wilco once again, this time in Bend. Shannon and I were super excited about seeing the band again. I think that’s when I became an official fan. It was probably one of the best shows I’ve seen, jammed packed with amazing songs like “Hummingbird”, “Via Chicago”, and “Muzzle of Bees”.
I think what I loved most about the performance was the instrumentation, an amazing guitarist to the left, behind him a keyboard player next to a massive drum kit. To the drummer’s side was another keyboard and arrangements of guitars for a multi-instrumentalist, while in front of him was the bass player. Jeff Tweedy, center stage, played many different guitars between songs but ended up playing the acoustic guitar, which is my instrument. There was a glimmer of hope – “Wow, an artist can rock a stage like this, in front of thousands of people, with that acoustic guitar and band?” I told Shannon as the band finished up playing “Forget the Flowers”.
It was an extraordinary show that revived us both. Work, soon after that concert, got really interesting as well also. Similar to my experiences before when working at the television station right out of college, the work environment was going through tumultuous times. The supervisor who hired me earlier in the summer was arrested on suspicion of using hospital credit cards and checks to steal tens of thousands of dollars. She was fired quickly after the revelation and ordered to pay back the money by the court.
Shortly after that I was asked to start working at the hospital instead of working remotely. The marketing team was still a bit shaken up from the scandal. My main job was to lay out the monthly newsletter and manage the development of the website. Things started looking up by fall as I was awarded a full-time position as the holidays rolled in.
Life started to normalize a bit. We took Ben on his first airplane ride to Arizona during the fall to visit my dad and family. We were all asked to come and surprise my stepmother for a birthday party. It was a very special moment because it was the first time all siblings from my father were together since we were kids, before I went to Mexico. One brother was attending the Air Force Academy, the other brother was holding down a great job as a computer engineer, and our sister was raising her kids in Arizona. My sister, Natasha, wasn't much of a drinker and it showed, as she only had a few beers before she was rolling on the ground giggling, while we all sat around the backyard fire pit laughing along. I told my siblings my crazy Navy stories, and we celebrated being together as a family.